When it comes down to a relationship between the two people, it can be very challenging to achieve a true harmony. There can be many reasons why it doesn’t happen. In this article, I’m focusing on some of the most common mistakes that we, women, make dating a man.
1. Talking about other men
One of the worst mistakes women make being in a relationship or even just dating, is talking about other men. Sometimes, we do that unintentionally, however, often times, women use this “trick” to make their men jealous.
By “other men” I mean:
men that give her attention at work/school/gym etc…
Men love being and feeling if not the only one, but at least special in a woman’s life. Talking about other men to him, we play with his confidence and self-esteem. Men are very sensitive regarding this subject.
2. Loving too much
This one is a very common mistake. When we meet a guy we like, we easily become fully focused on him. We hang out only with him, and even if not, we talk about him with our friends and family all the time. We build our life around him. We change our own preferences and activities to his. We want to be liked by him, instead of thinking whether we like him based upon his actions towards us, and not for who he is. We lose our own interests, opinions, and goals, because he becomes the center of our attention. Eventually, it turns into an unhealthy obsession with that man. Men don’t appreciate that, as we might expect. Instead,they lose respect for us and pull away. (Read more in “Women who love too much” by Robin Norwood)
3. Texting/ calling
When we respond to man’s texts right away, placing our priorities on the bottom of our to do list, or text/call him first, when he doesn’t much reciprocate to our moves, we lose our value, and our valuable time. At the same time, playing games, pretending being hard to get (waiting for hours to reply, for instance), is a very unnatural and unproductive way of behavior for your own self. Instead, spend time improving yourself, developing your knowledge and skills, and you will lose the necessity of playing hard to get, or an addiction to text him all the time and get texts/calls from him.
Controlling happens out of the lack of trust and self-confidence. Whether we control our man to get done something or to be loyal, we lose in both cases. Trust is an essential component of the relationship. If we don’t trust our partner, we create a barrier between the two of us. In the first case, we take our man’s masculinity accepting the role of a decision maker, and controller. Most of men hate being emasculated. In the second case, we act out of our own insecurities, and it’s very unattractive. A high value woman will never attempt to control her man and hold him next to her.
5. Being Impatient
When we like a man, we want him to act: to text us, call us, give us gifts, propose to us etc. A lot of men work differently. They think about everything slowly and thoroughly and act carefully. Instead of making him believing that it is his decision to go on a date, or get married, and let him come to us, we do his job for him. We call him out, call him and text him first, we pressure him to marry us. We don’t let a man fulfill his role as a man. And he pulls away because with our persistence we change an entire dynamics of the relationship. A man, when he wants a woman, acts, when the time is right for him. So ladies, patience is the key! Make yourself busy meanwhile!
6. Being Angry
Women are very sweet and gentle in general. Often times (especially once a month), however, we are just unhappy, angry people, sometimes yelling at our men, sometimes crying without a reason. It is normal, if it happens sometimes. We all are humans. But if we are angry on a regular basis, not even men, even us, we wouldn’t spend time with ourselves. Men like happy warm women, with a smile on their faces. The happier we are, the more attractive we are for other people, including our partner.
As a Conclusion….
…regardless all these possible mistakes that we make, and men rejecting us for different reasons, I encourage you not to be afraid to make them, and be ok with yourself even if you did. We don’t have to be perfect and nobody is. Whether we are angry, needy, or loving too much, we are so much more alive allowing ourselves to relax and experience life and love. Living through mistakes and rewards is so much more fulfilling than sitting there lonely, scared to be hurt again! Eventually, regardless of our imperfection, a high-value man will appear, accepting and loving us the way we are. And never forget to work on your own precious selves too! At the end of the day, it will be YOU who spends the most of the time with you. Make it fun, make it productive and fulfilling to yourself!
Thanks for reading, I hope it helps! Please, share with me other reasons of men pulling away and breaking up with us in your comments!
*(photocredit to Pixabay.com)